fake tan liek whoa!!1!

I am: not a witch's hat
I want: fake tan so I can be just like everyone else!
I have: to spend like ALL my money on making myself look, like, totally awesome with fake tan
I wish: I could have fake tan like you
I hate: being pasty and not having my superhot fake tan
I fear: my fake tan going streaky.
I hear: that fake tans are, like, the best thing ever.
I search: for the best looking fake tan in the WORLD.
I wonder: if I should go for really dark fake tan or really really dark fake tan.
I regret: not fake tanning at a younger age. Oh the pastiness!
I love: do-it-yourself fake tan. Streaky goodness.
I am not: naturally tanned.
I dance: only when I'm fake tanned.
I sing: 'fake tan, baby fake tan spend the night with me'
I cry: when my fake tan turns purple.
I am not always: fake tanned. Sometimes I'm super fake tanned.
I write: that fake tan liek rocks whoa!!1!
I win: with my super hot fake tan.
I lose: nothing. I'm fake tanned. Duh.
I confuse: solariums with fake tan.
I need: to be chocolate brown cherry dark fake tanned.
I should: go buy a bottle of fake tan.

As mentioned in my previous post daahhh-lings, it is the Year Eleven dance tomorrow night.
An exciting event.

You get dressed up, your friends get dressed up, you wear things that you may usually not wear.
You must look your ABSOLUTE best.
This is one of the rules.

Included under 'looking your absolute best':
* Makeup
* Fancy Hair
* Lovely dress/suit depending
* Fancy shoes
And the ultimate:

Fake tan.

Don't leave home without it.